Adult content warning!

Adult content warning!

This blog includes texts which are not suitable for minors. So, if you are under the age of 18 or if my entries might offend you, please leave immediately.


Shoo! Shoo!

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Amazon babies

So, yesterday I was browsing Amazon for some books, either whodunnits or romances. Well, and I couldn't resist to look what I'd find with the term 'baby'. ... Don't do it, the list is endless. And it will be frustrating. After two clicks the selection narrowed down to some titles that made my day and  let me start eating cookies out of bewilderment at the same time. Here they are, the titles I did not want to see and those that made my day :-|

I hope this is not advertising, but the titles do all exist

1. French children don't throw food. (Ours is not even there yet. We are not anti-French, by the way, but ask someone from Kent about the French. My in-laws and their friends sometimes say funny things about them, the teasing  kind of comment)

2. The impatient woman's guide to getting  pregnant. (I love the idea of this one. I wonder if they have pictures...)

3.  100,000+ Baby Names: The Most Complete, Fascinating, and Helpful Name Book You Can Find (1. This guy has self-confidence. 2. I love variety, though it might take time to get through the names)

4. Papa to go. (It's a German title, btw.; sounds 'different'; is he on the run? Is he like bad coffee? Doesn't he have any taste at all?)

5. French women don't get fat. (Now, what the heck? What's the message here? I actually had the key word 'baby' and they come with t h i s title out of all. Is it about contraception or sweets?)

6. The French women don't get fat cookbook. (A recommendation you get when you click  title no. 5. Yeah and it is just what I need at the moment. I think very slowly I understand why some of my in-laws keep making jokes about the French)

7. French parents don't give in. (I still don't get it; does it mean they are bad at negotiating?)

8. Baby animals: On the farm (that was a really cute one)

9. Bouncing Baby Bomb: The infant has landed. (What do they do with the poor kid?!)

10. Babies for the Billionaire (She is German, he is from the English-speaking world, but I don't know where from. His name is Kent. Ok, I am German, hubby is from Kent. So, maybe they wrote this for hubby and me. But what kind of romance is it? The title leaves lots of room for creative ideas: how many babies do we talk about here? All from the same mom and dad? Are they more like 'Babes'? Why do I have the impression it might have been a business transaction? Why a billionaire?)

I could go on with this. And I am curious about more of these strange 'French' titles. I have read none of these, and maybe they are good ones, but they really are funny titles. 


  1. I'm born and bred in Kent and I work within sight of the French Coast (well, on a clear day anyway) and my kids have never thrown food that I know of. The adults? Well that's a whole other story.........

  2. Hi, my husband’s parents live along the coast too, not far away from Folkstone. I think there are many strange or maybe even slightly offensive booktitles around, but if it is not too much, I really think many can be funny. Hmm, I have only once seen a Frenchman throw around some bread. He thought that was funny and he was an adult with friends.
    I hope you did not find it insulting from my side to leave the impression as if all people from Kent teased the French, because I exaggerated a little there. But if you felt this was offensive, I am willing to change my text, because I don’t want you to be offended because of reading my texts.

    have a nice weekend :)


  3. The baby books I would recommend are ' The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding' by La Leche League and ' Baby Led Weaning' by Gill Rapely. Jan x

  4. Hi Jan, thank you for the recommendations. This is really helpful information for me. The books by La Leche League are quite popular in Germany too, and I will definitely get a copy. Thank you :)



You are invited to leave a comment. I appreciate your interest and feedback and will try to answer. But please, no insults and don't be rude.