Adult content warning!

Adult content warning!

This blog includes texts which are not suitable for minors. So, if you are under the age of 18 or if my entries might offend you, please leave immediately.


Shoo! Shoo!

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Can Masters have PMS, too?

 The day before yesterday morning I was up and about early and Master had another few minutes longer in bed. All part of the morning service, coffee and breakfast fresh and served with love. When he came out of the bathroom I could already see that somehow HE (not me! I want to point exactly that out, NOT me!) had a grumpy look in his face.
This is rather unusual for him, because he is the easygoing and relaxed type of man, and usually in control of his own emotions - and mine, in addition to his own. And then he came out as if he had  had a bad night, which he had not. I know, because I was there too. During breakfast he was pretty quiet, though not as if he carried a heavy burden around. After all, Master is used to that, because he has me. :) But he really was a bit grumpy. I really tried to be especially good that morning, but to no avail. He knew that he was not at his best, because he said that before he went off to work.
For lunch it was not different. I greeted Master and he enjoyed that and spending time together was fantastic, but later on he was a bit moody again. Well, not like I am moody, because I think it is pretty obvious when I am, but a bit on the silent side, brooding a little where he usually wouldn't, not talking as he usually would, even a bit less affectionate than he would usually be :( . But he was still able to correct me when I used a little swear word -very quietly, only to the silly pot that slipped out of my hand.That was a result of him not being at his best, of course :) . I can feel that it has impacts on me, when he behaves in a strange way.
Master, naturally, is not like me during pms, he still is in control, but he also told me about his headache and not feeling well and that he was all knackered, but not as if he had a cold or the flu either. There are moments where he suddenly is a bit moody, where he usually is not, but he would not let me feel much of these negative moments. I can see it working in him. When we met in town for lunch, he was less attentive than usual again.  I am not in real sorrow because of that, because although Master behaves slightly different from his usual self, it is not because there is a problem between the two of us. I never had that feeling, otherwise I would not write about it, but cry bitterly instead. I love my Master dearly and of course I worry, and he knows that I do.
Yesterday evening we went out into the dark, cold and wet weather to jog through the fields. That helped for the rest of the evening and he came back relaxed and refreshed, whereas I came back exhausted. Can you imagine how frustrating that can be? Too much chocolate, probably.
This morning, I could perceive him being tense again. Less than yesterday, but it was there again.
He couldn't tell what actually might be wrong with him, which is usually one of my special abilities, not being able to know what might be wrong and not being able to give the problem a name.
Some of the symptoms he showed reminded me of what I experience in regular intervals, and that is pms (headache, fatigue, feeling unwell, moodiness, ravenous appetite for salty smoked sausage, etc.) I know, reportedly, women's menstruation cycles could synchronise, though I have never experienced this personally. Allegedly this could happen when women live together for a longer period of time. I have lived together with one of my best (female) friends for three years, so that should be long enough, but we never had synchronised cycles. If it were possible, though, could that mean that men's hormone levels adapt to their female partners as well? Actually if I compare this idea to Master and myself, it wouldn't work, because his 'cycle' would be around a week after mine, if he had one. Still, I hope that his version of pms or whatever it is, will be over again quickly. I don't like it when he does not feel well or is not as balanced as he usually is.  I think the worst part in all this is that I have this feeling I cannot do anything about it. I can try to give comfort, show love and anything that might help him, but it does not change much at the moment.
This is the morning of the third day where I observed Master not being at his best, though there are also signs of recovery now and he and I still have no idea what the real reasons for him being moody might be. As I said, I know it is all fine with the two of us, we both feel safe there, we are still communicating, though Master less so during the last days and everybody else would just shrugg it off. But since this is not his normal way of being, I really do worry about him. We talked about it too, and he understood that but had no way out of the situation. Sounds like pms, because when that strikes me, there is no way out for me either. Maybe there are just too many small and big things going on which he cannot solve. If so, I can understand that it is extremeley frustrating for him, because solving problems is his way of life (another reason why I am his...).
Master was disappointed that we could not go to his family for Christmas, instead we have to wait until February to see them. We go and meet my part of the family for Christmas, which is fantastic too, he is loved by them, too and he really enjoys being with my parents and my sisters as well. But, Christmas with his family is a really huge affair usually, it is like Christmas vacation with the Griswolds, and their house is overpopulated with close relatives, and when you come and see them all it always feels like coming home, because they are all very warm-hearted and lovely people. That applies to my part of the family too, of course, but where our family has a smaller way of celebrating Christmas, hubby's family makes it big, though not this year, because his parents will be in Spain then and Master is kept busy working. I just hope that all will be well again soon and that I can help to brighten up his days a little.
It took me a long while to organize my thoughts even this far, from Master to pms and then on to Christmas. It is difficult for me to write at the moment, because my Master's well-being is all important to me and it makes me sad when he is not like himself.  And I apologize if I bored you with my rambling, this was definitely more a therapeutic rambling from my side.

No comments :

Post a Comment

You are invited to leave a comment. I appreciate your interest and feedback and will try to answer. But please, no insults and don't be rude.