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Friday, May 30, 2014

Lawn mower madness

Warning! Venting ahead! 

What's wrong with mowing the lawn?! I just don't get it. No, not true, I get it. I was out this morning, doing some gardening. Real innocent gardening, in fantastic early summer weather. All was good.  I even put a hat on, got my bottle of water and had prepared the racing track to the loo. So, all was perfect. I went into our shed and saw the mower. It's one of those you  have to push. And this was awfully attractive. I saw it, I wanted it. ... And the lawn needed to be cut. Perfect. So, I got it out and started it without problems and cut the lawn. I was content. NO, I was happy. I do not know why, but I love that. Maybe because it is the loudest machine that I am allowed to use. Maybe there is some streak in me that wants to show that women can do work with machines other than Hank and the dishwasher? I have no idea, but I love mowing and I do not always get the chance.

We are not in the mountains, there are no hills and ups and downs in our garden. So, this was not really hard work. Getting up in the morning after a short night is harder to do than mowing, I think. So, I pushed this red monster of noise and was happy, and suddenly hubby was behind me, looking at me disapprovingly, stopping me, switching the poor mower off. I was really surprised. I had no idea that he'd be here this morning, and was definitely not prepared for being scolded by him.

Basically, it was the preggo+physical strain=forbidden scolding. I got that a  few times in the past, e.g. when I wanted to carry filled shopping bags into the house. Imagine, all pregnant singles would starve, if this really was such a hard work. Sorry. I apologize for being too ironic. I tried to 'discuss' things in this style, because the whole situation had really hit me by surprise. My point of view is that I can mow the lawn. It is not difficult. Hubby says this is not what I am allowed to. I think he was mad at me, because you have to start our mower with this cord that you have to pull. So this could be hard work. But it wasn't!

Well, my reaction was admittedly inappropriate. I was really pouting and backtalking and felt as if  a favourite toy was taken away. And I thought this was unfair. Maybe I still do, a little bit. 

We have come that far with baby. Hubby does not want to see me doing a.n.y.t.h.i.n.g. which could pose any risk to baby. He is right. And I did not take his fears into account. Maybe it looked like hard work, when I pushed the mower? All I know is that the machine was what I wanted to use this morning.

Did I think? Well, no. Hubby reminded me that we had talked more than once about these things and he does not want me to carry, push, drag or use anything heavy and especially not, if it could be a dangerous machine in itself (e.g. chainsaw + old tree + me). He is right, and this restriction doesn't exist without reason. Nevertheless, I am pretty frustrated at the moment. I am angry because I finally understood that, at least, I should have asked first. The thought never turned up. I am not joking when I say I had no thought about any safety regulation and rule that we follow here. 

I am also frustrated because I still feel as if something was taken away which I can handle. What vexes me most about it, is that at the same time, I can see clearly why hubby stopped me. He is definitely the last one who wants me to suffer and he is no spoilsport. He did it for baby and for me. 

Now I am really absolutely frustrated. Hubby had sent me in and stopped my gardening for the day. I am grounded for today. Not, because I have used the mower. He asked me, how I came up with that idea, in the first place. Last night we had talked about today's schedule and I wanted to be out in the garden. No talk about the mower then. That brilliant idea of mine only came when I saw the little red cutie in the shed. No, the real reason why I am grounded is my backtalk. And it is not because I tried to stand my ground, after all I thought I did something good. It was because I did not listen to what hubby was about and started backtalking as my way of defending, because the situation was out of hand for me. Hubby did not accuse me of anything, so there was no reason to defend, apart from my ego. :-(

Well, suddenly I have plenty of time inside, while outside is the best weather this week. Hubby will be back again in about two hours and I'll make amends. By now, after calming down  and venting here, I feel like a complete blockhead. You know, if I could get a spanking, this would be solved and peace would return immediately. Stress relief. Another possibility would of course be, to hold my thoughts together, but currently ....

We are going to discuss this again and this time I'll be more reasonable. And I'll apologize from the heart, because the only one who escalated everything was I and hubby has to know that I never wanted to cause him trouble, although I did and feel very sorry now for my childish reactions.

God and St. Francis Discussing Lawns

GOD: St. Francis, you know all about gardens and nature. What in the world is going on down there in the USA? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistle and stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect, no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in any type of soil, withstand drought and multiply with abandon. The nectar from the long lasting blossoms attracts butterflies, honeybees and flocks of songbirds.
I expected to see a vast garden of colors by now. But all I see are these green rectangles.Will and Guy's humour - Lawns
ST. FRANCIS: It's the tribes that settled there, Lord. The Suburbanites.  They started calling your flowers weeds and went to great lengths to kill them and replace them with grass.
GOD: Grass? But it's so boring.  It's not colorful. It doesn't attract butterflies, birds and bees, only grubs and sod worms. It's temperamental with temperatures.  Do these Suburbanites really want all that grass growing there?
ST. FRANCIS: Apparently so, Lord. They go to great pains to grow it and keep it green. They begin each spring by fertilizing grass and poisoning any other plant that crops up in the lawn.
GOD: The spring rains and warm weather probably make grass grow really fast. That must make the Suburbanites happy.
ST. FRANCIS: Apparently not, Lord. As soon as it grows a little, they cut it, sometimes twice a week.
GOD: They cut it? Do they then bale it like hay?
ST. FRANCIS: Not exactly Lord. Most of them rake it up and put it in bags.
GOD: They bag it? Why? Is it a cash crop? Do they sell it?
ST. FRANCIS: No, sir -- just the opposite. They pay to throw it away.
GOD: Now, let me get this straight. They fertilize grass so it will grow. And when it does grow, they cut it off and pay to throw it away?
ST. FRANCIS: Yes, sir.
GOD: These Suburbanites must be relieved in the summer when we cut back on the rain and turn up the heat. That surely slows the growth and saves them a lot of work.
ST. FRANCIS: You aren't going to believe this, Lord. When the grass stops growing so fast, they drag out hoses and pay more money to water it so they can continue to mow it and pay to get rid of it.
GOD: What nonsense. At least they kept some of the trees. That was a sheer stoke of genius, if I do say so myself. The trees grow leaves in the spring to provide beauty and shade in the summer. In the autumn they fall to the ground and form a natural blanket to keep moisture in the soil and protect the trees and bushes. Plus, as they rot, the leaves form compost to enhance the soil. It's a natural circle of life.
ST. FRANCIS: You'd better sit down, Lord. The Suburbanites have drawn a new circle. As soon as the leaves fall, they rake them into great piles and pay to have them hauled away.
GOD: No. What do they do to protect the shrub and tree roots in the winter and to keep the soil moist and loose?
ST. FRANCIS: After throwing away the leaves, they go out and buy something which they call mulch. They haul it home and spread it around in place of the leaves.
GOD: And where do they get this mulch?
ST. FRANCIS: They cut down trees and grind them up to make the mulch.
GOD: Enough! I don't want to think about this anymore. St. Catherine, you're in charge of the arts. What movie have you scheduled for us tonight?
ST. CATHERINE: Dumb and Dumber, Lord. It's a real stupid movie about ...
GOD: Never mind, I think I just heard the whole story from St. Francis



  1. Aww Nina I hope writing it down has helped a little. Your hubby was just concerned and wants to keep you safe. I can understand your frustration though, and I bet he does too. Be gentle with yourself.


  2. Hi Roz, yes, writing it down helped a great lot. Without, I would have exploded and I am a big bomb atm. I was pretty angry with myself and the situation when I came in - grounded. You are so right, he really does it because he is concerned and wants to see us safe. And I see that, too, now. After a handful of real cookies. :-) We had only a little time so far and since this has upset me, he wanted to wait a little longer, until we really talk about it. But at least I apologized, and hubby appreciated that I did and meant it. In retrospect this was so silly (from my side) that it hurts. ... But having my favourite toy taken away, while I was playing with it, was a really unsatisfying/frustrating experience.
    I hope you have a lovely weekend with fantastic weather and some quality time with Rick.



  3. Oh, goodness. Some families argue about who has to do the yardwork. Hormones are bubbling, and you've got a lot going on emotionally and physically. It's okay to lose it now and then. It's called being human. :)

    Maybe you can give yourself a nice treat, like a new book or a manicure. :)

  4. Hi Ana, oh well, by now I have recovered from most of what has happened, and after all, I still have my computer privileges. Today I used them a lot, I think... :-( while the weather was just right for gardening, outside. When it comes to being human, oh wow, I really got my share of that, I guess. :-) And, talking about treats, the first one are cookies, but they are directly pregnancy-related, so I don't know if they count. The second is a new book, yes, I just ordered what you recommended and can't wait to start. And the third, well, the manicure is a good idea, I think I should absolutely do my toe nails, as long as I am still able to see them. Thanks for your tips, and have a lovely weekend :-)



  5. Oh Nina, I really feel for you here. I totally get the feeling of having a toy taken away, and not realizing you were doing anything wrong to begin with. But I also see your Hubby's point of view. It's his job to keep you and baby safe. Everyone always talks about maternal instincts, which are strong, but dads go into overdrive too with their protectiveness. It may help to think of it like this: it's not about your ability to handle things, it's about your hubby needing to indulge his instincts and desires to keep you and baby safe. Whether or not an activity feels difficult is beside the point when it comes to this. Just try to enjoy being a pampered princess for now :-)
    Love and big hugs

  6. River, thank you for this lovely answer. I think you are completely right with what you wrote. I really had no idea that I did something wrong, although we had talked about such things now and then. But this was really gone when the lawn mower smiled at me. And you are definitely right, hubby wants to see us safe more than anything else.
    Oh my, that's a hard job, being a pampered princess :-) but I'll do my best to enjoy being spoiled. Lol, life is hard at times, isn't it. I really love what you wrote about hubby's point of view and I am going to pamper him as much as I can, too, to make up for my behaviour and because I do appreciate his protectiveness and need that, too. Thank you for that, and I hope you have a lovely weekend :-)

    love and big hugs


  7. Ugh, I LONG to live in the woods with no lawn or yard maintenance. I see no point in taming nature unless it is to our benefit (i.e. a vegetable garden). That being said, I understand that some people love to do yard work, and it seems your zen place is mowing the lawn and gardening :) It must be really frustrating not to be able to do the things that you could easily do in the past. It is definitely better to be safe than sorry, though, and pushing a mower can be deceivingly exhausting on the body, though it doesn't seem like it at the time. I think your hubby was right to be concerned, and I hope you made up and got to enjoy some relaxation outside!

  8. Hi Autumn, I love gardening, and it doesn't have to be a lawn. I'd love to have a little flowery meadow. ... But then I'd also want one of those mowers you can sit on and drive around with, at least once in a while. And you are so right, better safe than sorry. I have understood that and hubby is definitely right in stopping me when I start doing silly things. I am glad that I have him. Today the nice summer weather is gone :-(, but it is still good enough to go out and dig in the dirt. No mowing! Hubby has been quite understanding, all in all, and being grounded one (fantastic summer) day was enough for him, and I appreciate that he did not add anything else to his decision. I'll do better next time and think first, I hope. :-)




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