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Friday, October 4, 2013

Why do I submit?

As you probably have found out by now, I love talking to my husband and Master, because for me it helps to create and uphold trust and  love between us. I know that there are also lots of relationships where there is no talking. Coming to think of it, probably, there are more vanilla-couples who don't talk enough than there are M/s  or /D/s couples where the partners don't communicate the way they should. Since my owner (=husband, Master, etc.) and I (<-- I am allowed to use the capital i, btw.) believe that our way of life is good for us, we both do a lot to make it work. Even though I know that basically I am always in slave-mode, there are far more hours in a day, where you don't see or even feel that this is a slavegirl and this is her Master. I am very grateful that we have it this way, because it adds so much variety and more chances for being close. Sure, it is said that there are many hardcore-lifestylers who don't have much more than their Master- and slave-mode relationship, where every movement of Master's eyebrow has a deeper meaning and the slave always feels like a slave, thinks actively like a slave 24/7, has a slave-collar, is shackled 24/7, eats slave-food, has a slave-bed, can only sit on the floor or his/her slave-chair, probably there also is a slave-door, to leave the house.

We work for being close

For us it is all different. We spend a lot of time together and many times I don't have this idea that I am Master's slave. Instead we just love being together and talk, laugh, have fun, care for each other, even sleep in the same bed and sit at the same table. Guess what, I am even allowed to sit on the sofa. Well, most of the time, that is.
Nevertheless, when the moment is there and Master wants me to do something, I just do it. This is where even in everyday-life, our relationship is different from vanillas. If he wants me to bring something, I do it. If he wants me to dress a certain way, I do it. I also follow a general dress-code, that Master gave me, because he likes me best in nice dresses and skirts, so we just fit this into our everyday-life and that's it. I do it, because I want to please my Master and as in all other matters, he has the last saying and decides. Yet, I don't have the feeling of being nothing but an object, not cherished or loved, and that's because we talk and I have learned to trust my Master completely. When I want to talk to him, I have many chances to do so, although there might be times when he just says no, not now. If he feels like it, he could make me stop talking immediately, right in the middle of a sentence. But he doesn't, because my Master cares a lot for me. He wants to know what I feel like and wants to know my thoughts. I am really happy that I have him, because he makes me feel safe, loved, cherished, cared for and more. This is why I am able to submit to him so easily.
We fulfil each other's needs quite well,  he wants to see me do things for him and wants to decide for the both of us and I for one, want that from a man. I don't say this is right for anybody else, but for us it is definitely right. And before some aggressive feminist do-gooders start attacking me for this politically completely incorrect attitude, I just want to add once more that we talk things through and I am glad to leave decisions to my Master. If you don't like that, just live your life differently and I promise, I won't interfere. Please don't be angry with me, I am more the harmony-seeking type of woman.

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