In more than one of my posts I have written that women don't separate sexual intercourse from being emotionally connected, which is a major part of intimacy, but not all of it. Since you can be emotionally connected to many people, even if you do not have this intimate relationship, there are obviously differences. In a relationship of two lovers, the emotional bond is far stronger, deeper going. It reaches beyond what can be described in words, at least I can't put it into words. Maybe this is where your soul is touched and you are seen for who you are by your partner. As I said, I can't find the right words to describe this deep level of understanding and connection any better.
Being intimate is something that shows you how well you know your partner. You know or learn about what is important in his life, what he wants from life and what his needs are. When you have this deep connection, it is easy to see when somebody is hurt or happy. Sometimes it is easy, because emotions are not hidden then, you are all open and your partner is showing what he feels, too. You can virtually read the true partner you are with, see his emotional states clearly where others cannot. We are vulnerable towards our partners and that feels wonderful with them. Integral part of this is communication again, spending time together, so that you can learn what's going on in your partner. Spending time and sharing what might bother you, what you like or dislike, and of course, as a good way of expressing intimacy, be together sexually, making love, or just hugging, caressing, kissing and all the nice things that you would only do with your lover, not with anybody else. I think if you have that in your relationship, it is easy to feel your partner's love and your partner should easily feel loved then, too. If some aspects of what I consider intimacy were missing, I don't know if I would feel loved by my Master as much as I do. Maybe I would only know that something is not there but could not identify it, unless it were too obvious.
Maybe I should just keep my next thoughts to myself, but actually I can't. I think that many men have ideas about intimacy which are completely different from mine. My experience concerning that is limited, because I have not had many partners before Master saved me and the additional knowledge that I have is based on the biased information I get from my female friends. Apart from Master there is no man on earth I would question in detail about his opinion on intimacy.
This is not meant to be a man-bashing blog, far from it, and I apologize sincerely if anybody is offended by my text(s). And I may be completely wrong with my idea, but I believe that for many men, intimacy is something they keep on a physical level and do not go beyond that. Whereas women see the physical acts connected to intimacy only as a means to deepen their emotional connection with their partner.
Showing posts with label intimacy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label intimacy. Show all posts
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Monday, November 25, 2013
How do we share emotionally?
before anybody starts getting angry, I don't believe that women love more than men, but I believe often men and women love differently. This is my attempt to organise my own ideas about that topic and I don't want to criticise anybody with it and I apologize if I appear to do so.
Let's start with sex again to serve as an example. Done with the right partner it is all heaven and bliss, but I could not even imagine doing any kind of sexual activities if I was not emotionally involved with a partner, it would spoil the fun in it on the one hand and I would have nothing but a feeling of emptiness in me. I do not even believe that it is possible to have sex and not be emotionally involved. If so, it would be a saddening experience. I know that there are many women who don't have this narrow-minded point of view, and I think this is something that they share with many men who are serial womanisers and enjoy sex with people they do not even know. But this is not my cup of tea.
Sex is not the same as love, instead I automatically connect sex to intimacy, showing hubby/Master myself most vulnerable and being in harmony with him, because we see each other's needs in that moment. But perceiving your partner's needs does not even have to be a physical activity at all. We connect sex to it, because sex helps a lot in creating this moment where you either show yourself emotionally completely unprotected or you perceive your partner in this most vulnerable state. And sometimes sex is the right means instead of finding the right words to tell your partner what you feel, or instead of speaking in the wrong moment where you'd only lose this connection and destroy the moment.
Nevertheless, on an emotional level, we do not necessarily need sex to exchange intimacies with each other (although I love that part a lot a lot a lot), it also happens if you hug, laugh, cry, look at your partner's needs, talk and listen (!!!!) to each other and more. As a result you might have this feeling that your partner is there for you. If you don't feel that you can talk to your partner on a deeper level, so that you get the impression he does not give you attention when it is needed, then this connection might suffer too. Instead, if you have this moment of being truly together, even if it is only short, it might strengthen the relationship a lot.
The other important point is that your partner is there and able to perceive underlying messages in what you communicate with him. What if he only takes everything at face value? For me this would cause a lot of problems, because what I say does not cover all I feel. Sometimes I am not even able to verbalise emotions, because I have not realised what I feel somewhere in the back, in a deeper layer. That's where you need your partner to be able to read you, to read between the lines of verbal communication. If your partner is able to do so, this strengthens your bond and if you can do the same for your partner, perfect.
Let's start with sex again to serve as an example. Done with the right partner it is all heaven and bliss, but I could not even imagine doing any kind of sexual activities if I was not emotionally involved with a partner, it would spoil the fun in it on the one hand and I would have nothing but a feeling of emptiness in me. I do not even believe that it is possible to have sex and not be emotionally involved. If so, it would be a saddening experience. I know that there are many women who don't have this narrow-minded point of view, and I think this is something that they share with many men who are serial womanisers and enjoy sex with people they do not even know. But this is not my cup of tea.
Sex is not the same as love, instead I automatically connect sex to intimacy, showing hubby/Master myself most vulnerable and being in harmony with him, because we see each other's needs in that moment. But perceiving your partner's needs does not even have to be a physical activity at all. We connect sex to it, because sex helps a lot in creating this moment where you either show yourself emotionally completely unprotected or you perceive your partner in this most vulnerable state. And sometimes sex is the right means instead of finding the right words to tell your partner what you feel, or instead of speaking in the wrong moment where you'd only lose this connection and destroy the moment.
Nevertheless, on an emotional level, we do not necessarily need sex to exchange intimacies with each other (although I love that part a lot a lot a lot), it also happens if you hug, laugh, cry, look at your partner's needs, talk and listen (!!!!) to each other and more. As a result you might have this feeling that your partner is there for you. If you don't feel that you can talk to your partner on a deeper level, so that you get the impression he does not give you attention when it is needed, then this connection might suffer too. Instead, if you have this moment of being truly together, even if it is only short, it might strengthen the relationship a lot.
The other important point is that your partner is there and able to perceive underlying messages in what you communicate with him. What if he only takes everything at face value? For me this would cause a lot of problems, because what I say does not cover all I feel. Sometimes I am not even able to verbalise emotions, because I have not realised what I feel somewhere in the back, in a deeper layer. That's where you need your partner to be able to read you, to read between the lines of verbal communication. If your partner is able to do so, this strengthens your bond and if you can do the same for your partner, perfect.
Subscribe to:
Posts
(
Atom
)