Love our Lurkers day 11 - welcome :)

 

Hi everybody, sorry for the dust around my blog, but this year I had more of this feeling that there are simply not enough hours to do what I want to. Maybe you know what I mean. Uhm, maybe I am just bad at time management. But I am still happy that people stop by and seem to read here. Thank you for that. I appreciate this a lot, and if you like to, leave a comment. :)

Any news?

Not sure, but maybe there is no real news. I am still exiled with the girls because of this horrible man. Actually he is not even allowed to come within the vicinity of our house, but I am not sure if reminding him of that while he is trying to do what he wants to is really going to stop him. I have my doubts. 

As a result most weeks hubby is here during the weekends, and during the week I have different ‘bodyguards’, sometimes my sisters, at other times friends, and most of the time Amy, the best friend you could ever have. Nobody wants us girls to be alone here, which is considerate (<-understatement), but whenever this topic comes up I have this urge to justify why she is around so much more than anybody else.

Well, first of all I have not asked her to come around so much, it is what she wants (she insists), and of course I love her, and even more for what she is doing for us. However, any attempts of mine to kiss the ground she is walking on have embarrassed her, so I changed my plans to spoiling her as much as possible. :D She tries the same, spoiling us, I mean.

As you can see, if there were not some sort of stalking maniac after me, and hubby away during the week, life would be almost completely awesome. ‘Almost’ because of my granny’s ongoing fight in hospital. I have had some ups and downs because it makes me so sad, and it is frustrating me a lot that there is no reaction ever, but this is the new normal for the time being. I like this better than the alternative. In down moments I feel different and hate myself for that. Ok, this was the negative part, sorry for that. Let’s come back to the awesome bits!

We do sneak into Hamburg occasionally during the week; hey, where do you think I leave my time?! Driving around - but only into some parts of the city. Besides, since I am such a city kid, being here in the north is still like being on holiday! We live in the countryside, somewhere pretty close to nowhere, but this is a lovely place. And we have met a lovely couple with a little daughter, which is even better, because playdates for Tilda! :)

So, it seems there are no real news from over here, and I am simply glad that LOL-day is two days long. Things are just as busy as they are during the week, because hubby is here, and we girls want to spend time with him. It has become pretty late, but I simply enjoyed writing again, and tomorrow I’ll be visiting blogs. :)

Thank you for visiting here,

wishing you all a happy weekend, 

and 

a happy Love Our Lurkers day 2016

Ta-da! Back again! :)

 After a lovely week we returned from our visit to my in-laws late last night, something around midnight, as we had to drive out of Hamburg. That made the whole trip an hour longer than it would have been otherwise. We girls are all tired today, Kate has managed to drink some milk, but fell asleep still latched on, Tilda was not the early bird she usually is either, and I could have slept on forever. I don’t know how he did it, but hubby was up early, fresh and cheerful, when I still felt crinkled and wrinkled. He enjoys being here somewhere in nowhere, because it is like another holiday trip for him.

Being back with the family was awesome and we enjoyed that we had so much quality time. I love my parents in law dearly, and wished we’d live closer. Due to all the Brexit things going on when we were there one of the running jokes was that we might be back sooner than expected, if Britain decided to leave the EU. Well, they did, and I wonder where we’ll be in five years. And would I have to ask for a British or only for an English passport by then? :) The trouble is, no matter where we live, we’d always have to fly to see the other half of the family. Flying?! Oh please, not that. The least British Airways could do is offer general anaesthetics to make the journey more pleasant. I’d appreciate this a lot. 

Anyways, I have not been driving a car for a whole week, because nobody was willing to risk that, they say. Pfft ignorant lot. Actually it was only one of hubby’s brothers who said that, but the others giggled. Besides, my mother-in-law never would say this, and she’d even let me drive her car, though I declined politely after hubby’s warning expression. Or was it pleading? :) 

Whatever. And then it was Friday again, the dreaded day of leaving. I absolutely don’t like that part, even less so because mil and fil have trouble with departures too. My mother-in-law and I did enough crying for three. :) Leaving the sweetest parents-in-law behind was so hard, I’ll never get used to this. The good news is that they'll come over in December. I can't wait for that.

Due to circumstances we’ll be outside the city for the summer. We hope that things will go back to normal in autumn, though I do not really know why they should, because the monster who is responsible for our move is still there and he’d have to be caught red-handed while approaching me in any form. That’s scary in itself, and I am also afraid of what might happen if hubby was the one who’d lay hands on the monster. I mean, I do not condone violence in any form, but I am relieved to have a husband who is able to protect us, because I fear for our safety here. Last time just seeing this guy let me freak out and run for the hills. Frustrating as it is, I feel pretty helpless because I cannot even keep calm when thinking about these things. It was nice to forget this stuff for a week, and being outside Hamburg lets me feel much better for the moment.

Today we went to the hospital to see granny. All of us, and I was happy to see her lying in her bed. My thoughts might have wished for her being in a better place at times, and I am not sure if this is something I should be ashamed of or not, because I love her. However, seeing her today was just good. She was simply there and that was comforting. Seeing granny was good, tomorrow I’ll probably tell her all about our trip, and during the week Amy will be here as well, so we’ll visit together. :)

Friday was supposed to be maintenance night, but I don’t think they would have liked that at the airport. So we had maintenance tonight, and instead of feeling sleepy as I should, I am somehow wide awake and feeling pleasantly relaxed. :)

Wishing you all a 

very happy 

weekend!

When things are good the monster appears

 Finally, I find time to write something. I have not caught up on what you do, yet, and I am sorry for that. Somehow things are pretty busy for us, as seems to be normal now. :( However we have had a terrific time lately, the babies are awesome, Kate loves funny faces, she is so giggly and excited when we do that. Tilda has become pretty quick by now, I love how you can see that she is exploring all the time, and she has become a lovely little helper too. She knows how to put her own plate on the table, and at times Tilda puts socks into the sock drawer, instead of taking them out. :)

Things have settled down, which means that we have found our routine here, from visiting granny to baby gym, swimming, playdates, moments with friends, Amy comes visiting pretty often, too. Somehow she manages to squeeze in time, which is most awesome. Hubby has not had too much time lately, but at least we made the best out of the evenings. And in the upcoming week we’ll finally be off to the UK and spend time with the family. Woohoo!!! 

 

So, things have been really good, and then suddenly we get a punch in the stomach, out of nowhere…

On Tuesday and Wednesday Amy, the babies and I have been picnicking in a park. We had time to talk, play with the girls, be a little lazy, enjoy the warm sun, but then I saw one of the monsters I wished I’d never ever see again in my whole life. I almost got a heart attack when this happened, and I was close to throwing up, just from seeing him between the trees, not even close to us. He had seen me, but went away when he had noticed that I had discovered him. Amy had seen him too and tried to calm me down, but that did not work too well. We left the park and I called hubby who came home immediately, because I was such a mess.

With someone around I feel safe, and with hubby I know we are absolutely safe. I loved the weekend, because he had time, and even when he worked, it was nice, since he was at home. What I do not like is feeling as if being watched when going to the supermarket. Maybe I am simply overreacting, and I hate that one of the monsters still holds so much power over me, that just seeing him at the other side of a park is enough to let me panic. 

So, when we are back home from our trip, the babies and I will stay outside the city for a while, near granny’s home. I love my babies, hubby and Amy, and to protect them I’d do all I can, so that moving up north for a few weeks sounds like a minor inconvenience, until things have been sorted out. Actually this is not too different from our current life, because I do spend a lot of time near granny anyway (I’ll have plenty of time because I do not have to drive around that much. :)  ). However I do not like that now it makes me feel like running away or hiding. I have not had to do that before, because the baddies were gone, and I thought they were gone for good. 

I am so glad that we’ll be gone later next week. And I like that if there was someone stalking me, he’ll be very disappointed soon. :)

Anyways, 

Wishing you a wonderful week,

Full of all the good things

Happy Easter

Hello. It's me! :)

I am sorry that I have not been here lately and do not find the time to comment in your blogs. I have read some, but still have to catch up on a lot of what has been going on in your lives. Somehow life has had a surreal touch for me throughout most of February and March, because of several things going on within the family. I am just glad that it was n o t because of me. :) 

So, once early March was over, things got much better again quickly. Busy, but better. Somehow I find myself on the road a lot more again, commuting between our home in the city and granny's place, which is close to the coast. I am glad that I can be physically close to her, hold her hand, talk. I am still looking for reactions which cannot come, I know. :( The girls and I use the time when we are so close to the sea and we do have a walk along the coast. Uhm, that is, I do most of the walking, because most of the time Tilda is on her kiddyboard and enjoys the ride as I push the pram with baby. :)

Anyways, this is Easter, we have had two Easter egg hunts with Tilda and my nieces, Kate has been sleeping through these, probably because she is more into milk, and chocolate and sweets are not appealing to her yet. I hope you have a wonderful day, filled with all the good things in life.

Wishing you all a Happy Easter time 

full of love.

Can you name 54 things that make you happy?

This is something Ana Vitsky did in January 2014, and since I love lists I thought I'd also give it a try. :) However, Ana did not want the typical answers that would come, so her rules say 'No friends, family, work, bubble baths, alcohol, or food.'  For me, the idea behind this list is to think positively, which is awesome. :) 

There is no order in it, I just let the thoughts come. If I did not count right it is because I am maybe a wee bit tired, but feeling better, which is because of Kate/Katharina and Tilda and hubby; in addition, my besty came over for a few days and helped (a lot!). So, Amy is definitely t h e major reason why I am tired but feeling in a good place with enough energy to write. I couldn't see granny yet, which I'd love to do this week together with Kate, but hubby and Amy have already vetoed this for the next days, and I'll also have to wait and see what my midwife will say tomorrow. All of them want the best for Kate and me, which makes it easy to do as told, although I can't wait to show granny our little one. :)

Ok, the list ... 

1. The lovely smell of a baby!!! :)

 Smell of leather

Strong, vivid colours

Looking at paintings

Anything Monet 

Round flowing shapes 

The smell of catmint

A light summer breeze

Changing sheets

Sleeping in a clean bed

The first sip of fresh water when you are really thirsty (is that food?)

Going to England (hm, this is about family, I guess)

Listening to Swedish

Listening to Gaelic

Watching Flamenco dancers

Ballet

Wearing new shoes without blisters

Watching toddlers play

Playing with them! :)

Being hugged. You have no idea how susceptible this makes me.

Giving a loving hug

Cuddling toddlers :) ... I am stretching the rules, I know

Making a present 

Being physically close to someone (not sex!)

Learning something new

Frozen cobwebs in the sun

Anticipation of a good girl spanking

Clean, folded laundry

Putting it into the wardrobe

Wearing clean and freshly laundered clothes

Leaving a plane alive after the flight

Finding my favourite childhood doll in a box

Working in the garden

Planting new flowers and waiting for them to grow

Painting and drawing pictures

Sculpting with clay and wondering what the product is meant to be :)

Sitting down after standing for hours

Singing favourite songs

Helping someone else to be happy

Creating something new

Finishíng a DIY project

Planning a sewing project

Sewing it

Looking at a self-made dress

Preparing a meal and being told that what I cooked was delicious :)

Creating connections and keeping them up (I am sorry for being away from here so much lately!)

Good news

Making music

Listening to the early birds at dawn

Holding a kitten or puppy 

Laughing (the good kind of laughing)

Reading books
Sitting under a sky full of stars with someone I trust and enjoying the moment (stretching everything here)

54. Chocolate (that is not food, is it?)

54.1 If chocolate i s considered food and not soul-nourishment, I'd add blooming sunflowers :)

 

You know, not mentioning family and friends is sooo almost impossible when writing about what makes me happy, food almost as much. Hm, I think I need to diet soon. :)

Wishing you all a wonderful week!